Meet Ilana Sheppard of Marius Maximus Foundation for Mental Health

Today we’d like to introduce you to Ilana Sheppard.   

Hi Ilana, it’s an honor to have you on the platform. Thanks for taking the time to share your story with us – to start, maybe you can share some of your backstories with our readers.
I was born and raised in South Africa and came to the United States in 1999. My family has always been my main focus. I had 3 biological children and one bonus daughter. Life was good, but on November 19th of 2020, my entire world came crashing down. My youngest son Marius Maximus took his own life during the early morning hours. My entire world came to a complete standstill, and my life was forever changed. No parent should have to bury their child; it is just not the way life was intended. I don’t think anyone could even come close to understanding the void that losing a child creates in your life and how it changes the direction your life takes from there. 

For the first year, I lost myself in the bottom of a bottle and did not care how these actions affected anyone. The darkness that had taken over my life during those months was indescribable. By November of 2021, I had been on the news twice and had been a part of a mental health board for ABC 11. Seeing the hardships that so many were going through, the effects that it take on their mental health, and the fact that resources were not easily accessible. I decided that no one should ever have to feel alone, unloved, unwanted, or unseen. I started the Marius Maximus Foundation for Mental Health. 

This foundation focuses on providing hope and light during dark times by providing Peer Support Services, Mental Health services and education, Suicide awareness and prevention classes, and so much more to those in need in our community. What has driven my son’s foundation to be where it is today is determination. I have quit drinking and have been sober for over a year now. I have become a North Carolina Peer Support Specialist, QPR Instructor, and a Certified Crisis Intervention Specialist. 

Change is possible, hope exists, and you are not alone. I have been through hell and back, and even now I struggle daily. I cannot give up; I cannot give in to my demons, and I will not quit. This is not just for the memory of my son; I do this for every person who has ever felt alone and hopeless. You can beat the darkness, you can survive, and you can become better. Believe in you and what you are capable of. 

Alright, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall, and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
The road has certainly not been smooth; a failed suicide attempt, nearly needing a liver transplant because of that attempt. Friendships that are no longer isolation, days where I cannot even get out of bed. Pretending that I am okay, so others won’t be uncomfortable around me. I would say it has been a tough road and still is. 

Recovery is hard; it is a roller coaster ride. Whether it is recovery from substance abuse, mental health, or physical illness, it is like being on that roller coaster, and the ride never ends. There are highs, lows, twists, and turns. Everyone always thinks that recovery is in your head. As a norm, society does not give the same understanding of mental health recovery as they do of physical health recovery. 

Picking myself up every day and carrying on has been tough; there are days I don’t even want to function, and I wish that things were easier. There are days when my mind is my greatest enemy. Intrusive thoughts, images, and self-doubt. Can I really make this happen? This is a question I ask myself every day. My answer is always the same. If my son could make it living with his demons for 17 years, I can fight mine one more day. 

Meeting the right people who will support your mission in a community where mental health, substance abuse, and suicide is very much frowned upon is probably the greatest obstacle. Getting those with influence to understand the importance of mental health and everything that encompasses is a challenge. This road can be very lonely, and getting stuck in my own head takes energy to undo. 

Thanks for sharing that. So, maybe next, you can tell us a bit more about your business.
The Marius Maximus Foundation provides Peer Support Services, Mentoring, Workshops, Education, and Services about everything related to mental health. Our focus is on teens and veterans; however, we serve the community as a whole. Those who benefit from our services are individuals who suffer from substance abuse, mental health ailments, suicide ideation, homelessness, and/or societal disruptions. 

Our services are provided in part by community organizations like NC Works, Alliance Health, FTCC, and other non-profit organizations. The Marius Maximus Foundation is operated by North Carolina Peer Support Specialists that provide services based on lived experiences and meet our clients where they are in their recovery journey. We don’t tell you how to be better, we help you achieve it and walk beside you every step of the way. 

Our evidence-based practices help individuals take control of what they need to be successful in their recovery. By utilizing tools like the Mary Ellen Copeland Wellness Recovery Action Plan (WRAP), we help our clients obtain the healing and self-confidence needed to track and be aware of their own recovery. We believe you should know when you are well, what it looks like, what it looks like when you are not well, and what to do to keep you well. Who to turn to when you are unwell and how to get you back on track. 

Mental health affects everything in our lives; if we can understand how we get to being unwell and/or well, we can change the way we are affected by our mental health and gain relief from our struggles. We believe that change is a work in progress and can be obtained if we know what we want and how we want to get here. 

Can you share something surprising about yourself?
I am a recovering alcoholic and drug addict; I lived out of my car for a few months and suffer from PTSD, anxiety, and depression. This does not defy me or make me who I am. 

Contact Info:

• Website: mariusmaximusfoundation.org
• Instagram: mariusmaximusfoundation
• Facebook: facebook/mariusmaximusfoundation